Youth Is Wasted On The Young (comedy)

August 4th, 2008 admin Posted in comedy |

By Jan Michaels

Growing old does have one benefit … experience. So, I am continuing here to share my vast pool of knowledge. Of course my girlfriend can not resist telling me I need to clean the pool, but heres the list anyway.

1. If you do anything that gets your hands wet, soapy or dirty, your nose WILL itch.

2. When you give your email out anywhere on the internet, you will soon learn all you NEVER wanted to know about body part enhancements.

3. A cat does not love you. It simply allows you to live with it IF you pet, feed and clean the litter box on a regular basis. Otherwise, you are history.

4. Your Co-Workers, on the other hand, DO love you … at least as long as you continue to give them good stuff to talk about when you are not around.

5. You are NOT the master of your fate. Your mother is. And when you get married, your wife is.

6. Life is beautiful .. Life sucks … life is beautiful … life sucks. Repeat as necessary.

7. There is a chip in all cars that keeps them from starting unless you stroke the dashboard correctly and sincerely mean it when you say ..Come on baby .. you can do it.

8. Computers will only work correctly when you do NOT need them to.

9. A kiss is just a kiss, and a smile is just a smile, but a baby is forever.

10. There is no such thing as a ghost that can haunt you … except in your own mind.

11. Nothing is carved in stone … other than what will happen if you forget your significant others birthday or anniversary.

12. No matter how hard you try, you will NEVER be able to fold laundry according to your spouses instructions.

13. Anything you think will happen, will not… and anything you think will not happen, will.

14. Love is a two way street .. unless you are on the freeway and then there may be lots of exits before you get somewhere.

Jan Michaels is the creator of the Article Friendly Script for php & mysql, and can be found at: Article Friendly Article Friendly is Not Encoded, with tons of options, or try my new Serenity Niche Article Publishing Script, Available with Resell Rights!

How The Art Of The Unspoken Word Can Be Funny

Funny Videos and the Explosion of Videos on the Internet
By James Lim

With the arrival of YouTube, the scenario of videos on the internet has changed. Previously, people had to host videos on uploading sites or used to make a purchase of it. Now sites like YouTube, which provides uploading of videos for free but more than that it’s ease of use has changed everything. This is the main reason for its expansion even in countries like India, where lot a of people still use Dial-up connections. Such people earlier were not able to download these large videos but sites like YouTube made it possible now.

You can find almost all kinds or types of videos on the internet ranging from TV serials, MovieClips, Speeches, Songs, Tips and Tricks etc. But what I have noticed is that large number of people prefer to watch Funny Videos be it of any kind. e.g. Funny animal videos (I remember Discovery Channel used to broadcast one such programme), Funny incidents, Jokes, Shows, Clips etc. Funny videos category constitutes about 21% of all the videos together making it most favourite category onthe internet. All other types together consitute the remaining 79%.The reason behind this could be that, people often watch TV, Movies etc to get relaxed and hence they funny stuffs because it helps them to relieve their work or other load and get relaxed.

Now as more and more number of people started streaming(or watching) videos, it aroused interest of advertisers in this medium. Hence now, you see video ADs too on the internet which once in sometime used be only text link. Popular categories like Sexy Videos gets lots of hits, which make them an ideal platform for advertising. (Though it was more than a decade ago). Now this over use termed as ‘Explosion of Videos’ gave rise to two main factors:

1. Good factor is, it became a medium of promotion, entertainment, earning money.

2. Bad factor is that, it’s constantly adding pressure on the ISP’s (Internet Service Providers) to upgrade their insfracture.

Here are some facts about video streamings:

* YouTube claims to stream about 54.7 million per day which are unique streamers.

* About 70% of total US people or you can say 123 million people in US streamed videos in Januray.

* 7.20 Billion videos were watched in all by total interne audiences

* Peak time was 5pm to 8pm and was higher on weekends by about 60% as people are free at their homes.

Besides, these there are other reasons too, like expanding of broadband connections all over the world which further provides convenience to people.According to statistics by CacheLogic, which is a network infrastructure company, about 60% of the Internet traffic is over Peer-to-Peer swaps and about 60% of those swaps are involved in video sharing. In 1990’s too there was a similar problem when Audio and Video streaming was a new thing and large number of people wanted to watch the famous Victoria’s Secret fashion show. The server which used to host that video would collapse due to streaming requests.

So now again there is a requirement of a technology that eases this network traffic congestion and help defuse bandwidth burdens.But in the end I would like to say is that, it’s really fun watching your favourite Funny Vids, right